Green days new album / Triggers / Right back where it all started
So the new green day song and tour dates have been announced and this is the perfect subject for me to start this hole “speaking out about my problems”. now let me say i thought my Green Day days where over they obviously are not and paranoid wreck of a girl or not this gig is top of my list . Music is my biggest trigger (not all of them are bad feelings i will admit) and these triggers can bring back memories of times I had put in a box and thought i had locked away for good. until you hear them few verses that meant so much to you once upon a time and then all of a sudden all these emotions i felt when i was at low points can come rushing back and this brings me here to talk about it clearly…
when i was a hormonal teenager music answered all my questions. I literally walked alone. (if your a green day fan you will understand this) You might say i was a troubled girl but really good at hiding emotions i had older boyfriends who i shouldn’t have i played with kids who probably weren’t much good for me and listened to music that probably didn’t help either but looking back now i realise these roles played a major role in my mental health adventure today. (if you had tried to tell me that then i probably would of done a runner for it) that was a speciality of teenage me. (still is if we are on the path to honesty)
Green day days where easy (at the time i thought they where the worst) i started self harming then lets just say i use to think i couldn’t ever get better and for what say a good 8 years i used failed relationship break downs and partying as my cover up it all looked pretty on the outside but i done myself no favours. its intense being unable to tell anyone being a young girl with such a lost head and too scared to admit her emotions and feelings. i look back and there has been ups but definitely a lot more downs but silver lining im still here and the demons iv created inside me haven’t quiet taken over just yet.
But in every post i write and every feeling i express and try to understand i want to make it a lesson something to remember and reflect on and learn from all in all.
(what i learn from this i probably should of stuck to gangsta rap instead of good old emo green day)
Top Tip- TALK TO SOMEONE – Choose anyone it helps let it out. Call a helpline if you do not want to tell anyone close to you. they will listen they wont interrupt and they cant see you so it makes it easier. Sometimes that is all you need to get you through. (it took me years to find the courage to do it myself so no stressing if you bottle it the first few times.)